I follow the news way too closely and have determined that the answer to our economic woes is to change the money. All coins should be square.

Think about it for a minute. First, someone would need to retool all the stuff (technical term there) to stamp coins. That equals JOBS!.

Someone would need to make the new gizmos that take coins to put in parking meters and soda machines and whatever else takes coins. That equals JOBS!.

Then all the machines that take coins would need to be retrofitted. That equals JOBS!.

If we change the demoninations of our coins -- maybe a 2 1/2 cent coin or a 32 cent coin, everyone would need reeducation to do the new math. That equals JOBS!.

Cash registers would need to be changed. That equals JOBS!.

If you're with me, send me all of your old coins. I'm just here to help you out.